The Mental Load of Caregiving
- Lisa Dewberry
- Aug 25
- 4 min read
Updated: Oct 23
Shedding light on the invisible emotional labour carried by caregivers: parents, partners and those supporting mental wellness
In countless homes, behind closed doors, millions of caregivers quietly carry a load few see but many deeply feel. Whether it’s a parent navigating a child’s anxiety disorder, a partner supporting a loved one through depression or an adult child tending to a parent living with dementia, the emotional and mental weight of caregiving is real, and it’s often invisible.
At La Playa Media and Marketing, we believe in giving a voice to the stories and struggles that too often remain hidden. The mental load of caregiving isn’t just about doctor’s appointments, medication management or keeping schedules straight. It’s the emotional labour, the constant mental juggling of worry, responsibility, guilt, love and anticipation, that silently shapes caregivers’ lives.
What Is the “Mental Load”?
Originally used to describe the unpaid cognitive labour often assumed by women in households (think: remembering birthdays, scheduling school pickups, knowing where the kids’ socks are), the term mental load has since expanded. In the context of caregiving, it refers to the relentless inner dialogue:
“Did she take her meds today?”
“Is he having an off day or is this a deeper spiral?”
“How can I keep them safe without making them feel controlled?”
“What happens if I break down?”
This mental load doesn’t clock out at 5 p.m. It follows caregivers to work, into the grocery store and to bed. It shapes decisions, limits spontaneity and builds a constant undercurrent of stress even when things appear calm on the surface.
The Unique Strain of Supporting Mental Wellness
Caring for a loved one with a mental health condition introduces an additional layer of emotional complexity. Unlike physical health issues, mental health struggles often come with stigma, unpredictability and invisibility.
Symptoms can fluctuate daily, making it hard to establish routines or predict needs. Caregivers often find themselves both the primary support system and the stability anchor, even as they navigate their own emotional fatigue.
Many live in a cycle of hyper-vigilance: watching for signs of relapse, monitoring moods and adjusting behaviours to de-escalate stress. This state of “always on” can erode caregivers’ own mental wellness over time.
The Emotional Landscape of Caregiving
The emotional labour of caregiving is full of contradictions including:
Love and resentment often co-exist.
Guilt for not doing enough pairs with exhaustion from doing too much.
Empathy for the person suffering collides with anger at the situation or the lack of external support.
These emotional tensions are rarely acknowledged publicly. Caregivers often suppress their own struggles for fear of appearing selfish or ungrateful. And in the absence of open dialogue, many internalize a harmful belief: “I should be able to handle this.”
But caregiving isn’t just a personal responsibility. It’s a social issue that demands more attention, more resources and more understanding.
The Silent Cost
Recent studies show that caregivers are at increased risk for burnout, depression, anxiety and even physical health problems. And yet, many continue their roles without access to therapy, respite care or flexible work arrangements.
The emotional labour caregivers perform is unpaid, unrecognized and unsustainable without intervention.
Even more pressing? When caregivers suffer, the entire care ecosystem weakens. Supporting caregivers is not a luxury. It’s essential.
How We Can Do Better
We can’t change the emotional landscape of caregiving overnight, but we can make it more visible, more manageable and more supported. Here’s how:
1. Normalize Talking About It
Caregiving is still surrounded by silence and shame. Let’s replace guilt with compassion and isolation with connection. Sharing your story helps others feel seen and it breaks down stigma.
2. Invest in Community Support
From local mental health groups to online communities and social services, access to resources can make or break a caregiver’s experience. Encourage local councils, schools and workplaces to invest in community-first care models.
3. Respect Boundaries
If you're supporting someone who is a caregiver, don’t assume they’re okay because they “seem strong.” Ask how they’re doing. Offer practical help. And respect when they say “no.”
4. Design with Empathy
At La Playa, we encourage wellness brands to design their products, services and experiences with caregivers in mind, whether it’s a mindfulness app that supports emotional regulation, a flexible membership for those with unpredictable schedules or workplace policies that genuinely foster work-life balance.
Caregivers are a vital yet under-recognized audience in both wellness innovation and community outreach, despite an estimated 349 million informal caregivers worldwide, many of whom provide essential physical, emotional and mental support without formal recognition or resources. When we design with empathy, we don’t just create better offerings, we build stronger more inclusive communities.
A Call to Care for the Caregivers
Caregivers carry a weight that’s invisible to most, but it’s time we change that. The emotional labour they bear is immense and yet, with the right support systems, narratives and societal recognition, they don’t have to carry it alone.
At La Playa Media and Marketing, we believe in using the power of storytelling, branding and communication to shine a light on the hidden challenges and champions of our communities.
If your brand or organization is ready to make a difference in the lives of caregivers, partner with us to tell the stories that matter.
Let’s turn visibility into action.
📩 Contact La Playa today to start building campaigns that elevate empathy, resilience, and real impact. 🌐 Visit us at www.laplayamediaandmarketing.com
📧 Email us: hello@laplayamediaandmarketing.com
Because behind every strong caregiver is a story waiting to be told, and supported.
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